The Bar Episode aka Thats a First !

The Legends of Rock in Koramangala is the bar I afflict on Fridays or Saturdays. The watering hole dishes out loud, tasty, retro-rock with unfailing sincerity. Also, if one can wave and holler vigorously enough, one might even coax those merry souls to dish out a few drinks. This post however, is not about those things and neither is it about the fact that despite my repeated requests, the DJ has simply refused to play Janis Joplin. It is about things uncannier.

In circles wide and narrow, I have been known for the paucity of beans, but sang-froid I am known for. Unfazed is the state in which people would find me generally. I however will not unship falsehoods unto the unaware world. What happened yesterday did leave me with the Puzzled Gape. There have been episodes when I have got outside a whole plate of chicken tikka before the whisky could even say hello to the soda. I have, many a time, polished off the whole fried pomfret ere the cola could exchange common courtesies with the rum. These things regrettably do happen and I, to a large extent, condone it. What did happen, however cannot be condoned.

So there I was with M., assiduously unwinding, trying to shake off the lethargy of a slothful week, watching Black Sabbath on the large plasma screen, who armed with an uncharacteristically young Ozzy Osbourne were belting out Paranoid. In the meanwhile, after a lot gesticulating, M. had managed to engage the flitting attention of the waiter and proceeded to order masala peanuts and a pitcher of beer. All was right, correct and pretty with the world.

Then, it happened -- The waiter arrived with the masala peanuts. Follow me very closely here. Only the masala peanuts ! The beer was not be seen anywhere in the vicinity ! I have guzzled kegs of beer in patient waiting for masala peanuts, but this particular situation was unprecedented. It was the reversal of a complete world order. One needs the peanuts with the beer, not the beer with the peanuts. I was all masala peanuts and no beer ! I have had my share of trying experiences, and during those trying experiences, I might have faltered and I might have lost it, but the world around me always has remained rock-steady. This time however, I could see the whole world gently spinning before my eyes. This singular, conspicious lack of beer with such an abundance of masala peanuts really got me. It was Unexplicable. It was Unprecendented. There was nothing else to do. I proceeded with the Puzzled Gape.

Tags: drinking, Bangalore, Koramangala, humour, The Legends of Rock